Most days I can't wait to leave work to go home and pick up the baby from daycare I look forward to seeing her, she always smiles when I walk through the door and crawls right over to me. She crawls up my legs until I pick her up and I love it, I love that she's excited to see me. I also want to get home so we have enough time to take a. walk around the neighborhood, that's just something that I like to do. Sometimes though I just rather stay at work like today, she was up all night last night woke up at 2 a.m. and I thought I was going to cry because I had a hard time falling asleep, so of course I didn't go to sleep at my normal 9 p.m. stayed up until almost midnight. I couldn't fall asleep and then my child wakes me at 2 a.m. crying because she's teething and upset. She stayed up forever. So today I am tired and I just want to sit and do absolutely nothing, which has me sitting here staring at my computer and not getting anything done because my brains not working. I'm thinking do I go home since I'm not doing anything or do I sit here and stare at the screen and at least be happy about the fact that I don't have to do anything I can just sit and stare if I want. Ultimately I make the choice put my mommy pants on and walk out the door heading to daycare to pick her up at daycare to go home because although sitting here doing nothing sounds fantastic to my tired body I want to put on pajamas. I will go home with the spawn of Satan, that is teething and driving me Crazy. I will pray that her daddy comes back from being out of town a few days early because I don't know how many more times I can deal with it. I have to be honest one of the reasons I feel that I am not taking this so well is because she is a pretty easy baby, these rough patches throw me for a loop. I feel beside myself in a sense that I feel like I should be doing something more, but I don't know what else to do, it leaves both of us tired and cranky. I'm sure I am not the only one to feel this way once in a while but when work is more tempting than home you definitely get that "bad mom" thought running through your head.
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